February 10th, 2016

Dear little pea,

This week has been pretty tough; physically and mentally.

I’ve still been unable to work from the virus and have been feeling pretty powerless. Fortunately I have a really supportive and understanding Doctor which always helps to reassure my otherwise frantic mind.

Yesterday was probably the hardest so far; waking up feeling incredibly sick which sent my body into an ever-so-delightful non-epileptic seizure (NES) which sadly I am all too familiar with. I want you to know that however much this scares me, I never want you to think that this is your fault. They’ve been occurring throughout my life and I still have yet to find treatment.

I know you’re doing your utmost best at growing into the little person you’re going to become. I’m scared of hurting you or compromising your ability at development and I am hoping, with all my might, that you’re still okay in there and that I’m giving you all the nourishment you need.

Some people don’t understand my medical issues and that’s okay because it’s still quite uncommon and even  health professionals find it difficult to understand. At the same time though, the people that don’t understand aren’t always the nicest which is upsetting and makes me blame or question myself. I’m doing everything in my power to stay positive and to wean the negative people out of my life but it’s not always as easily done (especially when you work for these people!) 

Dad and I put an application in to an agency last week in the hopes of moving into a bigger, warmer, more comfortable house for when you arrive. Sadly this wasn’t to be and we just have to keep on looking. Everyday I’m having to reassure myself that certain issues are out of my control, not to blame myself and to always try and do the best I can for you and your future.

To keep on the positive yellow brick road; I’m feeling much better today, the sun is shining and it looks absolutely wonderful outside despite the temperature!

img_6169This is the view from our driveway, going down the road 🙂

I also started to update the family tree (with the help of Nanna!) and we’ve managed to track our relatives all the way back to 1806 when my 4th Great Grandfather was born! When you arrive you will be the newest little pea in the tree 😀 ❤

Love mumma pippi xox

You’re currently the size of a Ladybug. Your lungs and facial features are now forming, starting with your nasal passages that will develop into your nose. You’re making me crave Marmite and it’s the best thing to stop your Dad from stealing my food! 😀

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